"Well, it could be worse.  At least we're not that other team from LA."

Editor's Note -- Today's WOTN is by guest author Raza. Big thanks to him for recapping one of the more ridiculous, bawful days in recent memory. Give him some love in the comments if you enjoy the post as much as I did.

Hawks at Heat: It was the 3rd quarter and the Hawks looked to be in control with a 10 point lead and Miami playing some pretty uninspired ball.  Then, in typical Hawks fashion, they let the game slip away faster than Lebron's hairline.

Said Spoelstra: "Sometimes you have to win them ugly, and that was ugly there for a while."

Pretty sure he was talking about Mike Miller's face.

And Welcome back Chris Bosh, who made his presence felt by going 3-14 from the floor. Way to be like a Bosh, Chris!

Grizzlies at Warriors: Memphis has now won 11 of their last 13. The key to success?  Get a chance to play the lowly Warriors.

Said lockdown defender Tony Allen: "Looking at the way these guys were just locked in on the bus, nobody was really saying too much," said Allen, who had 12 points and six rebounds. "Wasn't nobody talking about no TV shows that was on before. Wasn't nobody talking about anything that didn't have to do with the game, and I kind of noticed that. The focus was from way before the game, and it carried over."

And clearly wasn't nobody talking about his grammar (or lack thereof).

Despite the hoopla around hiring Mark Jackson, the Warriors have now lost 4 of their 6 and will fail to make the playoffs this year.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Celtics at 76ers: Just when you thought the Celtics were back and Rondo was trying to stick it to Ainge for threatening to trade, our faltering 2012 Celtics are back baby!  Getting pummeled by a struggling Sixers team for a 32 point whooping.

"We just didn't have it," Celtics coach Doc Rivers said. "We missed shot after shot and nothing was working. But give them credit. They were organized and they played really well. They're a good team and we just didn't fight through it."

Something tells me we'll be hearing a lot more of that from him this year.

Lakers at Wizards Generals: *whistles* oh boy.

You'd think after blowing a game to Detroit that the Lakers would try to get back on track and destroy the lowly Wizards.....and they did.....for two quarters anyway.

And then Kobe happened.  Going 9-31 from the field Kobe shot the Lakers out of this game as they fell apart in the fourth after "nursing" a 76-55 lead.

From ESPN:
"There is growing concern among some Lakers players as to whether first-year coach Mike Brown and his staff have the X-and-O wherewithal to fix a Lakers offense that is averaging its lowest per-game point total (94) since before the advent of the 24-second shot clock in 1954-55. Brown's effect on the Lakers' defense has been undeniable, but sources say the team's ongoing struggles on the road -- with L.A. dropping to 6-14 away from Staples Center following a loss in Detroit and blowing a 21-point lead to the undisciplined Wizards -- have some veterans longing for a return to the trusty Triangle offense preferred by Brown's predecessor, Phil Jackson."
Well, the Mike Brown's old Cavs team used play excellent D, but on offense it was gtfo Lebron's way while everyone else stood around.  Here it seems more like gtfo out of obe's wya and watch the losses pile up.

I mean, you've got two 7 footers who shot 6-11 (Gasol) and 6-8 (Bynum) so why not give it to the masked mamba to go 9-31.  This makes sense right?

"When our backs are against the wall," Young of the Wizards said, "you can't do nothing but go up."

Tell that to the Lakers.

Rockets at Craptors: Remember when the Rockets were on Cloud 9 and battling for a Top 5 spot in the West?  Yeah, well reality has sunk in and they have now lost 5 in a row.

"We're playing basketball. We're not doing an eight-hour shift or 12-hour shift in the mine," McHale said. "We just looked a half step slow. There were loose balls, we didn't get any of them. That just caught up with us."

Well maybe they ought to go work in a mine and see if they can find their game.  Would probably take longer than a 12 hour shift.  Just sayin'

Jazz at Bobcraps: Yes, the Jazz won, but only by 6 points to a team that is striving to be one of the worst in NBA history.  Somewhere out there Anthony Davis is trembling about his future team.

Bulls at Bucks: Normally I would go on and on about how awful (and injured) Rip has been this season, but when you can get late game heroics like this:


You can overlook the negatives.

Amazing shot by Rose who continues to have another great season.

"What a luxury to have, you don't even need to run a play," Skiles said. "You can just bring it in, throw it to a guy and he can get whatever shot he wants."

Sounds like Mike Brown's entire offensive playbook right there.

Clippers at Nets: Well, there was all this hype about landing Chris Paul and getting Billups, but can we take a second to discuss just how bawful the Clippers D has been this year?  Yes, they rallied to make the game close, but this is against the Nets people.  Who only won for the 4th time at home all year.

Check out the defense on Jordan Farmar's game winner right here:


With Vinny D as head coach (only by title, rumor has it he just plays Tic Tac Toe and MASH on his clipboard during games) would anyone be surprised if these guys get a brutal 1st round match up and fade away?

Suns at Thunder: Phoenix looked great for 3 quarters, all the hopes of giving OKC just their second loss at home was on the horizon.  And then...well they are still the PHX Suns we all know and love despite Nash's best efforts as the Thunder took control in the fourth to grab the win.

"We never think that way, especially at home. I always think that we can come back," said Durant "I mean the refs love us"

At least, that's what I heard he said.

Knicks at Spurs: Remember how crazy the Linsanity train was?  Well, thanks to Melo, he has effectively killed it.  What a mess in NYC, you've got a coach who should probably be coaching division 1 girls basketball and surrendering his moustache to Tom Selleck, and two franchise players who are complete black holes on offense.  After winning 7 straight, the Knickerbockers have now fallen back to the 8th seed in the East and are in danger of missing the playoffs.

"I don't know. I really can't answer that," Anthony said. "I really can't put a finger on it." in regards to what is wrong with his offensive role on the Knicks.  He continues to make shifty eye gestures to this day.

"(The Spurs) don't have nearly enough talent to compete with us," Stoudemire said. "Our personnel, our talent is off the charts."

If that's the case, then what good is talent without a brain?  Because Amare didn't get the memo.

As for the Spurs, just when they got everyone healthy, they lost TJ Ford to another injury.  But have no fear, SUPER MANU is back (17 points, 6 assists, 70% shooting) and along with Duncan (17 points) and Parker continuing his MVP like play (32 points) to keep the #2 seed in the West on lock.

Pop was so disgusted with the Knicks who voluntarily got himself ejected with the Spurs up 22 so he could hit up a wine bar.  He hasn't reported back to the team since.

Cavaliers at Nuggets: Six straight losses for the Cavs, and then Kyrie Irving took over.   But despite all that, this just might be the greatest (or weirdest?) goaltending ever:


A double dunk ladies and gentlemen!

Labels: , ,

23 Comments:
Blogger stephanie g said...
Carmelanoma.

Bynum had more TOs than rebounds. I thought one of the perks of playing with Kobe were all those potential KBAs.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Good post, Raza.

I'm pretty sure the Kevin McHale photoshopping potential is a gold mine (I'm sorry) for such maestros.

As for Amare, he does realize "off the charts" can include incredibly dismal performances, too, right?

P.S. What did Mike Miller (or his family) do to you? I knew I was in for a nice read with a jab like that early on.

Anonymous Czernobog said...
Great post. Loved it.

Just one little thing, though. It's called Ebonics. It has it's own grammar. It doesn't sound right to me either, but it's consistent to the point where it's recognized as a patois, and has been for a while. Let it go.

Blogger ~9r43m3~ said...
great post...glad to see this site isnt dying..just yet...

Anonymous Team_BC said...
Great post--glad to see the site's back up.

Surprised this hasn't been posted: http://rosedontdance.tumblr.com/

Anonymous Anonymous said...
good post. thanks for covering/taking over. but you shouldn't insult someone's grammar when you yourself don't have the best spelling/grammar/computer spell checker

thanks for the posr sir :)
btw ersan's career night goes down the drain against the buzzer beater of rose who haven't really had a good night. pity.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Nicely done, Raza.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
thx raza. not nearly as good as bawful, but at least something. let the hate roll..

Blogger pedro said...
Wow Raza!! Loved it. Please keep this blog alive, I miss WotN so much.

Anonymous JJ said...
I don't know if I'm the only one, but I was really excited Bawful finally posted WOTN. Then, I saw Dan's name and thought it was a little odd, but it could be interesting. Then, I realized it's actually a guest post and didn't know what to expect. But, I read it and it was good. So, thanks, Raza.

Blogger Raza Husain said...
Hey guys,

Thanks so much for the kind words.

I know the grammar was a bit sloppy in parts, as I wrote the post during my lunch break, but if I am ever able to submit another future post I promise it'll be proof read for next time.

As for Bynum, yeah he had more turnovers than rebounds, that should have been mentioned, but then again he shot 75% from the floor yet only got 8 shots in total.

And Mike Miller just has one of those faces that piss you off even though I respect his game. Joining the Heat didn't help his case.

I know the original writers (who set the bar incredibly high for such posts) are swamped with their actual lives but hopefully we can find a way to keep a good flow going as this is one of the best NBA related blogs out there.

I also want to thank Dan for letting me do a guest post. Thanks Dan!

Anonymous Matt said...
Great post, Raza. One thing that I would add to the Fakers-Generals portion of the post is this clip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhCQM-ql58g

Can't get much more bawful than that.

Anonymous JJ said...
Matt, that clip made me literally LOL. Thanks.

Blogger Raza Husain said...
Haha wow Matt, that layup was almost as bad as Joel Anthony's airballed layup from last year.

Good stuff!

Blogger Wormboy said...
@ Steph: Thanks for reminding me of Melo's phenomenal knickname! ;)

I'll add this article:
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/03/09/sports/basketball/for-the-knicks-distraction-by-addition.html?_r=1&ref=basketball

Melo's really on the ropes here. He leaves Denver and they improve dramatically. Then the Knickers go a tear with Melo injured, and their chemistry is ruined with Melo back. Grim.

I like how commentators are saying that the Knicks need time to create chemistry. But I can't help but think about how long it took Jeremy Lin with his first real chunk of NBA minutes to create serious chemistry, and that chemistry lasted until the Knicks "stars" returned. I should be fair though; this isn't on Amar''''e, but on the one big black hole (Carmelanoma) and the two little black holes (J.R. Smith and Baron).

And best of all? The Knicks are fighting to make the playoffs and meet the buzz saw that is the Heat. In other words, they are fighting to be swept.

Anonymous baconater said...
Great post Raza! Even if I didn't know you were a noob, I would have been happy with WOTN. But pulling that off as a noob is impressive!

Also, for cznerobog (whose name looks like a typo) the term 'ebonics' is just a euphemism for 'how ppl talk when they think they are too gangsta to speak properly.'

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Is it just me, or are the Blazers trying to get a good pick in the lottery?

Here's a link with some "highlights":

http://www.blazersedge.com/2012/3/9/2858951/portland-trail-blazers-at-boston-celtics-blooper-reel

Anonymous Adrià said...
Raza, thanks for your post, it made me laugh :)
I really would like to do it myself too, but since I live in Europe I gotta stay awake until 6 am :P

I hope more guest posts are coming, and if I pull out a "NBA zombie night" (or whatever you may name it), I will write one too.

See you around!

Anonymous nico said...
To Raza,

Your post was brilliant, hopefully there will be other ones coming up !

Anonymous Grassi said...
what about the Nick Young Lay-Up or Lay-Over i should say:D

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I really hope I'm not the only person who turned the Nets game on last night just in time to see Gerald Green score....., for the Rockets.

Blogger Factfinder said...
Unintentionally dirty quote from Gerald Green:


“Everyday he just rode me... and it wasn’t in a negative way. It was always in a positive way...

http://www.examiner.com/new-jersey-nets-in-newark/gerald-green-continues-to-defy-the-odds#ixzz1oqTWy6Et

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