Here we see the beginning of Iverson's All Star season this year. Wait, what?

Another week has come and gone here in the Association with plenty of bawfulness for us all to enjoy, but last night's All Star announcements provided the cherry on top of the Basketbawful sundae. Rather than do the usual "Worst Of" pics from last night, instead here are some reactions last night to Allen Iverson's selection as a starter in this year's All Star game:







Nationally Televised Games - Friday:

Lakers at Knicks - Last time the Lakers were in MSG Kobe scored 61 points. After last night's loss to the Crabs, look for him to try to do it again.

Bulls at Suns - When two horrible road teams meet in a game like this, I tend to pick the one that's playing at home, but maybe that's just me.

All the Other Games - Friday:

Kings at Magic - After the Magic's recent slide, consecutive home games against the Pacers and Kings must spell an awful amount of relief for the Magicians.

Mavs at 76ers - You'd think this one would be one-sided, but Dallas needed a last second block to preserve a one point win over Washington the other night, so you never know.

Heat at Wizards Generals Bullets - I wonder if Michael Beasley's gonna make any pre-game predictions about how this should be an easy win for Miami tonight...

Bucks at Craptors - Didn't these teams just play each other on Wednesday? What ad wizard came up with this schedule?

Bobcats at Hawks - As hot as Charlotte has been in 2010 (9-1 so far), they've still got only 3 road wins for the season. In any event, how can you not love Gerald Wallace vs. Josh Smith?

Frail Blazers at Celtics - I figured playing against a beaten up Pistons team the other night would have delivered Boston victory on a silver platter, but since that didn't work maybe a home game against the league's most injury-depleted team will cure what's ailing the C's these days.

Pacers at Pistons - Remember when these two teams got into that huge brawl at the Palace of Auburn Hills back in 2004? Keep reminding yourself of that to stay awake if you're one of the unlucky few who ends up watching this tonight.

Hornets at Timberwolves - Time's running out for CP3 to make his case that he should be an All Star this year, and games like this one against one of the worst teams in the league can only help his cause.

Thunder at Grizzlies - Not only are these two of the most exciting up and coming teams in the league right now, but these are also the two youngest teams in the league, and you know what that means - the losers have to go to their room afterward with no supper.

Rockets at Spurs - Expect the cowboy boots and 10 gallon hats to be flying in this one. Fun fact: the projected centers for these two teams tonight stand 6'6" (Chuck Hayes) and 6'7" (DeJuan Blair). What is this, a high school game?

Nyets at Warriors - Both teams play no defense, but New Jersey plays no offense either. This is your Basketbawful Game of the Night.

Nationally Televised Game - Saturday:

Bulls at Rockets - Sweet, two teams on the second night of a back to back playing each other! Since Chicago will almost surely have been blown out the previous night in Phoenix, I'm guessing they'll be the more rested of these two teams in this one.

All the Other Games - Saturday:

76ers at Pacers - In case you've been missing out on the magic that Allen Iverson has been putting on display on the court this season, you'll want to watch this one so you can see why fans everywhere thought he should be in the All Star game!

Magic at Bobcats - As Florida's other team can tell you, beating the Bobcats in Charlotte isn't as easy as it looks.

Thunder at Crabs - Thunder, Thunder, Thunder, Thundercrabs Ho! This should give us a look into whether Bill Simmons looks right in his prediction that Kevin Durant will have a better career LeBron James.

Frail Blazers at Pistons - There's probably enough injured players from these two squads to fill out most, if not all, of a full team's roster. Look for a lot of guys in suits on the bench in this one.

Kings at Heat - For Sactown fans everywhere, let's hope the Heat are in full 'Bipolar Girlfriend At That Time of the Month on Crystal Meth' mode for this game.

Timberwolves at Bucks - Ladies and gentlemen, this is your Basketbawful Game of the Night.

Hornets at Nuggets - Anyone remember how New Orleans got beat down by 58 by Denver in the playoffs last year? I'll bet the Hornets do.

Warriors at Suns - I'm willing to bet that just seeing this game on the schedule brings a scowl to Bill Russell's face. If you're a betting man who's placing a wager on this game, my advice is to take the over.

Nyets at Jazz - Bipolar though the Jazz have proven to be, my guess is that even if they're way off their games they can still beat New Jersey.

All the Games - Sunday:

Mavs at Knicks - It's Wizards and Sixers and Knicks, oh my! as Dallas continues the easiest road trip in history.

Clippers at Wizards Generals Bullets - Don't let the short slate of games fool you, this one would be the Basketbawful Game of the Night even if there were 10 other games scheduled.

Lakers at Craptors - Bosh gets a chance to audition for the Lakers in person, just in case those Bynum for Bosh rumors that Peter Vecsey was spreading have any truth to them (doubtful).

Labels: , , , , ,

25 Comments:
Blogger Dan B. said...
Thundercrabs Ho! = brilliant.

Love the "reactions to AI" picture set. Very clever.

Blogger Preveen said...
So much for the Celebs attend Lakers games and avn network attends Clippers games theory.
http://thesuperficial.com/2010/01/rihanna_isnt_dating_another_ch.php

I don't think the "leaked" photos quite qualifies her for avn.

HAHA the kobe lebron one is the best. they're like, are you fucking serious...

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Agreed, the Kobe LeBron one made it, as did Melo, great pics.

Hey Yams, did you check out the reading list Phil gave to the Lakers for their road trip? Jeanie Buss's twitter has the list, notable mentions of 2666 to Pau, his own book to Artest, and a PICTURE book of Che Guevara to Adam Morrison. El Oh El

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Also, I'm eagerly awaiting a chris update on how that boiling water feels. Just to recap, Kings 1-4 at the beginning with Kevin Martin and Tyreke, and that win was over the Iverson Grizzlies. Post injury, Kings 0-5 with both in the starting lineup. Rumors say Dallas making inquiries, offering Josh Howard or something.

Hey, here's this unrelated video, don't forget to read the video description

Anonymous Anonymous said...
who just saw derrick rose just throw down the hammer on dragic?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Blogger Davros said...
Dragic just got posterized by Rose. What's the opposite of the smother chicken?

Blogger chris said...
AnacondaHL: Hey, at least you've NEVER had to deal with relocation threats, no Finals appearances, and Tim Donaghy for your Suns. (And the ignominy of having a team that was once located in freaking Omaha.) You guys just happen to have an infamous Chris Webber-style timeout in 1976 that led to a rule change...and, um, Charles Barkley's big behind. :P

Sigh.

And before you ask, I was at that win over the Cancer-infected Grizzlies. See, maybe all the purple paupers need to do is pay me to go to games whenever K-Mart plays, and it'll be an instant win. Right?

Northern California's championship drought is one thing, but one can argue "hey, THE WARRIORS HAVE A TITLE."

Why yes, they do.

And that makes the suffering even worse for the River City. :(

Blogger chris said...
But at least the Kings aren't the New Jersey Nyets, who I am watching on TV getting pwn3d in East Oakland right now. I guess that's all the paupers have to play for, but that's more than the folks in Hoffaland can attest to!!!!

Blogger chris said...
AnacondaHL: You KNOW the fear and loathing in Sacramento is bad when the SactownRoyalty postgame thread contains the following gems:


Mucho Moss:
This is nowhere near as depressing a situation as 2008/09. That was an epic suck.

pookeyguru:
I thought 97/98 sucked Then Kenny Natt and Will Solomon happened.

Mucho Moss:
Historically speaking the Ed Pinckney/Joe Kleine debacle, err, I mean roster of 1987-88 wasn’t a barrel of laughs either.

When you’ve been a Kings fan as long as some of us around here have, it helps keep things in perspective.


Anonymous Wouter said...
Amare Stoudemire on the Bulls:

"Chicago did the unexpected," Stoudemire said. "They hit shots."

Ouch.

Blogger Wild Yams said...
God bless The Onion: Shaq Misses Entire Second Half With Pulled Pork Sandwich (worth it for the photoshop alone).

Blogger Dan B. said...
Wild Yams -- Oh my God, that photoshop has me in tears. Thank you SO much for sharing that.

Blogger PatrickLydon said...
just noticed the stat line in my fantast league. Ryan gomes last night played 20 minutes and did nothing but foul and miss shots.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
chris: while I empathize with your position, it's incorrect to say that the Suns never had to deal with Donaghy, or Donaghy related stupidity. i.e. 2004-2008.

Blogger chris said...
PatrickLydon: +7 suck differential, baby! AS A STARTER!

There has GOT to be an explanation for that.

AnacondaHL: True. Of course, had they not been facing a team with Kwame Brown as starting center in 2006, there wouldn't have been an appearance against the lesser tenants of Staples in the second round...while the Kings have never gotten the chance to face against any Laker team with Kwame Brown as center. :P

Blogger chris said...
Dan B. and Wild Yams: Well, that "greasy hands" thing explains those turrible free throw numbers don't it?

----

Basketbawful lurker Dr. Hank Pym sent me this epic link, the 1970s NBA on CBS theme!!!!

http://tvpmm.com/documents/360.html

As I pointed out, the only way this would truly reach a higher point on the bawful stratosphere is if one line was changed to "the name of the game is lacktion"...which, judging from Ryan Gomes's stint, certainly is the case.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Cleveland won despite missing 20 free throws?!

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
A great blog for random ass basketball pictures, some of which have been featured at this site, (seriously, go there and browse), but check this one out I think I found the new uniforms for the AABA.

Anonymous allison said...
Man love grabbed off Yahoo frontpage:
http://l.yimg.com/a/p/sp/tools/med/2010/01/nba/1264184306.jpg

Blogger chris said...
If the Kings could JUST play no more road games...as this stat at SactownRoyalty attests -

The Kings, for example, are a .571 team at home (hey, we’re the Phoenix Suns!), and a .136 team on the road (hey, we’re in between the New Jersey Nets and the Minnesota Timberwolves!).

Blogger Jonathan Chuongco said...
uhh... I saw this injury report from the Clippers and saw this: Sebastian Telfair - Ruptured Groin.

http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/injuries;_ylt=ArTFbm2vxCGd1Kdf8nlRxq.8vLYF

Blogger Jonathan Chuongco said...
According to Mark J. Miller, a team had taken some interest on Samuel Dalembert. But this team is apparently... from the NHL! That's right, the Los Angeles Kings have taken some interest on Dalembert!

http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/rumors/post/Sixers-Dalembert-doesn-t-want-to-be-traded?urn=nba,215444

just in case the text would be updated, here is the screenshot of the article.

http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/7749/picture3azl.png

Blogger Lord Kerrance said...
I was at the Raptors/Lakers game last night, and let me tell you, it was a Kobe Klassic. During the first half, Kobe drew doubles, made passes and racked up 8 assists. But the Raptors tied the game with a little left in the second quarter, so guess who took (and to be fair, made) the last three shots of the quarter?

The second half was all Kobe. After sitting out the first half of the 3rd quarter, Kobe came back in and did what he does: forced up shots against double teams and carped on the officials. Highlights included protesting a non-call by sitting on the offensive baseline and letting his teammates play 4 on 5 defence at the other end, ignoring a WIDE open Bynum under the hoop to go 1 on 2 against Bargnani and Wright, and doing the same to Farmar in the corner on a different possesion. After finishing the first half with 8 assists, Kobe's final tally was 9.

Blogger Wormboy said...
Great photo montage of AI reactions! Loved it! Bron and Kobe was the best, but other gems in there.

Links to this post:
Create a Link