I know we've been facetiously referring to Tracy McGrady as "Knee-Mac" on this site for the last few months, but this play convinced me that it was less an expression of gentle mockery than the unconscious recognition that Tracy has undergone a full-scale transformation. Similar, in many ways, to how Stifler's mom went from a reasonably hot MILF in American Pie to a pasty, bloated ham creature (who apparently ATE the real Stifler's mom) in American Pie II.


Could this be yet another sign of the alien invasion I've been warning people about? I think we need to travel as a group to Texas and check Tracy's basement for body-snatcher pods. I'll bring the flamethrower if somebody else brings the marshmallows!

Update! Okay, this is weird. After publishing this post, I had an odd feeling that I'd seen the same title somewhere before. Sure enough, it had been used once...by me, last year, in an NBA Closer column. There's nothing like plagiarizing yourself.

[Thanks to Ace and Stott's Era for sending the video link.]

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15 Comments:
Blogger Unknown said...
Dear Admiral Ackbar,

Be a man.

Signed,
Tommie "Back to back national titles while having Crohn's Disease" Frazier

Blogger DDC said...
Wow. T-Mac was laughing when he missed that ego-ectomy inducing dunk attempt, but he had to be crying on the inside. If there was one play to sum up his season, this is it.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
flohtingPoint -- Forget Tommie. I bet Knee-Mac's "woes" make Aron Ralston want to punch him in the groin for the rest of his life. With his remaining arm, of course.

DDC -- Exactly.

Blogger Unknown said...
@Bawful: Oh man, I never heard that story before. But damn, "Such desperation took him to great measures like carving his name, date of birth and presumed date of death into the boulder, drinking his own urine because of lack of water and videotaping his last goodbyes to his family." Nothing like a cold cup of wiz to pass the time while perfecting your own tombstone. Maybe Ralston can take turns giving TMac the business with Jim Abbott. Either way, I want to see them both arm wrestle....

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Bawful, you've received my emails about the Suns. In my opinion, they deserve a worsty for most mismanaged talent. Traded away players for a guy who doesn't fit their system. Got rid of one no-D coach to a no nothing-coach. Truly an Epic Fail if there ever was one. It gives me sad face.

Blogger Basketbawful said...
flohtingPoint -- I don't know if you remember those Miller Light "Man Law" commercials, but he was in some of them, and there was one in which somebody was bitching about some pissy little injury and the camera panned to Alston, who held up his stump. The camera then panned back to the complainer, who looked properly ashamed. Knee-Mac should have that same look of shame every time he hobbles onto the court.

Ah, Jim Abbott. Loved that guy. A pitcher who was born without a hand. Awesome. I loved how he used to jam his catcher's mitt on his stump and then sling it onto his good hand after pitching. Crazy.

Buck Nasty -- Indeed I have, and indeed they do. It gives me sad face, too. Just historic mismanagement. The Suns really could have been a dynasty had someone with only slightly below-average intelligence been running the show, instead of that miserable miser.

Blogger Wild Yams said...
I would say maybe Knee-Mac was tired, but the play occurred about a minute into the game, so...

Blogger Unknown said...
@Bawful: Nah, I missed pretty much all USA media from 03-08 due to serving in Europe/Iraq/Saudi/Japan with the USAF. I'll youtube it though.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Wow. That is an awesome failed dunk attempt. Yao Ming could learn a thing or two from Knee-Mac.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
flohtingPoint-

Did somebody say Admiral Ackbar?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2gB01x0sAM

Anonymous Anonymous said...
We should also look for the real Magic Johnson and the real Larry Bird while we're at it and even Patrick Ewing. His head just isn't the same shape anymore...it couldn't just be that Scottie Pippen elevation-elevation could it?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
such a shame @ 29 yrs....I mean that was just pathetic on so many levels

Blogger stephanie g said...
I don't think it's a light hearted joke. It's just sad and pathetic. KneeMac for about a year or so was easily the best perimeter player in the league. He was amazing. That feels like such a long time ago though.

Now he's averaging 15 ppg on 38% shooting at the ripe old age of 29.

If he were a steak he would have no pink in the middle. He's DONE. He joins the ranks of Grant Hill, Penny Hardaway, Ralph Sampson, and others as "what ifs" thanks to injuries.

Also: Tracy McGurney

Anonymous Anonymous said...
The Cavaliers are quickly becoming my nr. 1 hated team, overtaking the Celtics Lakers and Knicks. At least those teams, for all they faults take their loses with dignity. Really, with Orlando James got hacked everytime (read, didn't get the superstar treatment) with Washington he was called for travel (no superstar treatment) with Indiana he got called for a foul (no superstar treatment) with the Lakers they were missing players...Really, how many excuses they can come up with?? If they need that many "superstar treatment" they maybe they are not that good of a team to begin with. And then there was that Mo Williams All-star snub that James ranted about, not one, but two games in a row! A real All Star would have took his snub to elevate his game, especially when Mo was against Nelson that night, an All Star.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Hey, read the recap of the Pacers vs Cavaliers. http://www.nba.com/games/20090210/CLEIND/recap.html. What's interesting about this article is this passage: "But NBA stars, especially those in the realm of James, aren't supposed to be treated this way - especially in a game they've dominated." (referring to LBJ's late game foul) Has the NBA finally admitted to being biased to their stars?