fan whore
As punishment for fan whoredom, Lebron was
forced to sit by supernerd Poindexter T. Finkman.

fan whore (fan hor) noun. A fan who either roots for multiple teams or who foresakes certain obligatory loyalties -- such as to the hometown team -- to support another team of his or her own choosing.

Usage example: Lebron James was seen last night rooting for the New York Yankees to beat his hometown Indians. What a fan whore.

Word Trivia: A couple weeks ago, somebody asked me which NBA team I followed. I replied that my favorite teams were the Bulls, Celtics, Jazz, Pacers, Suns, and Spurs. His reaction was priceless; it was like I'd just admitted to eating a live kitten. He wigged out and said, "What a fan whore! You only get to have one favorite team. Choose one and stick with it."

I got the same kind of reaction a few months ago when a guy on the train platform asked me whether I rooted for the Cubs or White Sox. "Well, I live in Chicago," I said, "so I root for both teams." The dude literally jumped up and down like he was stomping huge, poisonous spider. "Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?! You can't root for the Cubs and the Sox! That's like, it's like rooting for God and Satan. You don't getta be good and evil, kid. You gotta pick one or the other."

Lebron James got a dose of the same medicine last night, when he was seen rooting for the New York Yankees, and thus against the hometown Cleveland Indians. Lebron was even wearing a Yankees hat, and fans started jeering him and chanting "Take of the cap!" One fan even screamed "Go to New York, then" (another fan heard that and said "No, no, please don't"). Today, there are countless stories in the media and across the blogosphere calling James things like "traitor" and "betrayer." The thing is, Lebron's allegience has never been in question; he's a lifelong Yankees fan. So the anti-Lebron uproar is a pretty blatant overreaction. Especially since Lebron isn't really a fan whore, he's more of a bandwagon fan; he's always been a "frontrunner" and therefore footed for the Chicago Bulls, Dallas Cowboys, and Yankees during his teen years.

Frankly, I don't understand the mentality that you can't root for whomever you want. Especially since, logistically speaking, it increases your chances for potential happiness. By rooting for six NBA teams instead of just one, I increase my chances of seeing one of my teams go all the way by 15 percent! (I think; I'm not a mathmologist.) And what if I'd only pulled for the White Sox this year? By rooting for the Cubs and Sox, my baseball-induced misery will ultimately have been postponed almost an entire week. That, my friends, is the sweet smell of success.

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6 Comments:
Anonymous Anonymous said...
People have to remember, this is sports we're talking about. Granted, what people do in the field/on the court can be awe-inspiring and very entertaining. But when you seriously think about it, it's still a bunch of grown men (and women) flinging a ball back and forth.

And last time I checked, it's still a free country. I too don't get the mentality of being unable to root for the teams that you want to root for. Or even the unforgivable sin of switching from one team to another.

-RT

Blogger LooseChange said...
i'm totally a fan whore. finding out what hotel the visiting team is staying at is pretty straight forward, the challenge is figuring out how to get into their rooms... wait, we are talking about the same thing, right?

i root for numerous teams too, as long as they are not playing the suns that night. in that case, the entire opposing team could spontaneously go blind for 48 minutes, and i'd be alright with that.

Blogger Evil Ted said...
This reminds me of another recent fan whore incident that made a rather big splash in Boston. I'm sure my fellow Colts fan Basketbawful will relish seeing Brady get skewered by his own...

http://bostondirtdogs.boston.com/Headline_Archives/2007/05/yankee_doodle_b.html

http://sports.aol.com/fanhouse/2007/05/03/front-page-news-tom-brady-in-a-yankees-hat/

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Most people who love sports love it for the emotions that it invokes within us. Nothing creates an emotional connection to a sport like rooting for one team, through thick and thin. The people who get the most happiness out of a championship are the people who stuck by that team though all the dry years. People who have a bunch of favorite teams won't ever know what that feels like.

Having multiple favorite teams is like betttng on all the squares in Roulette, but you won't walk away a big loser but you won't be a winner either.

Anonymous Ashley W said...
I'm not trying to be a smart-arse...

But you increase the chance by 600%

Best blog on the net!

Anonymous KHayes666 said...
Forget Lebron, whatever happened to Poindexter Finkman?

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